Wednesday, March 30, 2011

#3 - Mom X 2

We've spent a good dead of time talking in class about mothers, "monstrous" mothers, mommy bloggers, what makes a "good" mother... we've also discussed the different standards held for mothers and fathers, gender stereotypes/inequalities, etc. But let's think about something atypical for a moment. Lesbian moms!

Though perhaps not as common as the average mommy blog, blogs of "two-mom families" like this blog called 'Mombian' provide some interesting perspectives on common mommy-blog topics.

For example, in this article the conflict between homosexuals who want to have children and those who feel it is "selling out" to the heterosexual status-quo is likened to the mommy wars between stay at home and the working moms who accuse the others of being against feminism.

In this volg by the site's creators, books about lesbians and motherhood are discussed. They make an observation that I never really thought of before - in regards to one work of fiction revolving around a lesbian couple's legal battle over frozen embryos from a previous (heterosexual) marriage, the couple remarks that it is refreshing to read a bestseller book about lesbian motherhood that doesn't focus on the search for a sperm donor. I'm suprised that this theme is so common. Actually... the only other popular work I can think of featuring lesbian mothers also prominently features the sperm donor... (The Kids Are All Right).

That aside, even the concept of lesbian motherhood is challenging for our current society. As the bloggers remark, people feel a need to ask "which one of you is the 'real' mom?" Many people just aren't able to wrap their heads around the fact that - gasp! - more than one person can mother a child, that the person mothering may not even be female, and that providing an egg or carrying the child to term does not magically make someone in to a mother, let alone a child's "real" mother. Maybe this has something to do with why most works of pop-culture featuring lesbian families also prominently feature a male (or the search for one's chromosomes, at least).

1 comment:

  1. These are great observations, Kiely. This would be a good place to think about Ruddick's theory of mothering as practice, right? Because if it's practice not biology, 2 moms makes perfect sense. Also, Collins' "other mothers" -- an idea that removes the sexuality factor.

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